CrapCake Royale

Yes, I admit it. I'm a cake snob. Cake should be light. Cake should be tender. Cake should be GOOD. There is no reason to eat bad cake. In fact, it breaks my heart to see people settle for bad cake.

Tonight I found myself wandering into Cupcake Royale in Ballard. Yes, the very same Cupcake Royale that I have deemed "CrapCake Royale". I was waiting to pick up Jeremy from a team dinner he was attending at the Kathy Casey Studio and as it was after 8:30, most shops and coffee places in Ballard were closed or closing up for the evening. The only place that was inviting was Cupcake Royale. A bit annoyed, but desperate to kill some time with some coffee and maybe a newspaper, I walked in. It was crowded with hipsters of all ages- a table full of "Stitch-n-Bitchers", girlfriends sharing a table and some gossip, techies typing away on their Macs. In fact, it was so crowded I had trouble finding a spot to sit down with the coffee I had ordered. What was it about this place that had people coming in droves? Was it the free Wi-Fi? Tons of tables that people to could chill and listen to the beat of dance music? Or simply the fact that Starbucks and Tully's were closed? Whatever it was, I am sure it wasn't for the cupcakes.

Here is my very favorite chocolate cake recipe that makes very good, very light cupcakes. Pair it with a white chocolate cream cheese frosting or a mocha buttercream and man oh man you are in BIZNESS.

** Note: It's important when making cake from scratch that you start with your butter and eggs at room temp. No one told me this until I went through many trials and errors with cake. The more you know.


CHOCOLATE BUTTER CAKE

1 cup hot coffee
1 cup cocoa powder (and don't use Hershey's! Spend the extra dough and get the GOOD stuff. I prefer Schokinag)

Mix together until there are no lumps. Add to that:

1 cup cold water

Set aside.

Sift together and set aside:
3 cups cake flour
2 teaspoons baking soda
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
3/4 teaspoon salt

In a bowl of an electric mixer; beat at high speed until light and fluffy (and I am talking PALE. Perhaps 4 or 5 minutes on high):

2 sticks (8 ounces) unsalted butter
2 1/2 cups sugar

Once the butter/sugar mix is nice and pale, add one at a time:

4 large eggs
1 1/2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract


Add the dry ingredients alternately to the butter/egg mix with the cocoa/coffee mix; mixing until smooth. (BUT DO NOT OVERMIX) Make sure you scrape the sides and bottom so that all the butter/flour is incorporated.

If making cupcakes, fill lined cupcake pans 2/3 full with batter. Bake in a 350 degree oven for 17-18 minutes. If making a layer cake, line bottoms of 8 or 9 inch pan with a parchment paper round and bake for 25-27 minutes if using 9 inch round, 30-35 minutes if using 8 inch round. Do the ol' toothpick test to make sure.

If you want a frosting recipe, email me. I'm too hyped up on Crapcake Coffee to type any more.

I don't know if this recipe will help you take over the world, but together, we can rid the planet of bad cake.